Cloudy day. Just like I am feeling. Sitting at work wandering why did I bother to get up this morning. Still feeling the pain from the unexpected brake up, trying to get a grip on my life so I can continue living and stop being a plant. It hurt to see her again happy but it hurt more when I saw pity in her eyes. She felt sorry for the pore clown . People do look at me with pity these days .I do hate it but when I do think better even I would look at my self with pity so it is OK I guess. But the worst is when you get “friends” to help you ease your pain by telling them the things that hurt you and they just use it to feel better about themselves or to have some gossip to tell others.
Need to stop thinking gloomy thoughts. Hmm m . It is kinda hard. What is the good think in all this?
Well I am still alive , I do wake up every morning ,I did find out that I do have some really good friends even people I have never meet in person. People took my side and that is a minor victory even if I did lose the war if you can call love war. But that will give me strength for the next one. I should start looking more in the future than trying to fix the past I know that.
I don't mind being funny for my friends. This one is for them
The Clown
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